“If things were different”
If things were different, you would have never left, my heart never broken, you would have chosen me, you would have noticed the pain behind my smile, the wounds you made that would turn into scars… the fear of not knowing, the love you weren’t showing, the pain of being left behind, never being chosen.
I was there for you when you fell, held you when tears were pouring from your eyes, gave you love, you did not give me, yearning for the person you were supposed to be.
You hurt me over and over again, and still I let you, still I am here giving you love unconditional, something I doubt I will ever get in return.
You take pieces of me with every silence, Every door left swinging open, Every cruel word thrown like glass, at the girl who only ever reached for you with open hands.
I made excuses for your storms, Called the thunder “exhaustion“, the bruises “moments” the emptiness “just a season”. But seasons change and I hope you will too.
I keep believing love can fix what you broke, that if I bled gently enough, you might finally see me, But you only learned how far I would bend before I broke.
And still… this heart limps towards you like it doesn’t know how to walk away. Still it burns. Still it hopes. Even as the fire in me goes out, one ash at a time.
One day you’ll turn and find there is nothing left of me to take, and I’ll be gone, faded away like a flower in a cold front. Maybe that flower will grow again, but for now my petals fall for you, my heart holds hope for you…
With every breath I wait for you… until it will be my last.
-Fox
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